Sunday, February 19, 2006
hi dere.. hmmm... tings hav been getting hot again.. i tink i should make tings clear so tat tis misunderstanding will not go on..
well, 1stly, i dun see any prob wif me n lixin.. in fact, i hav been trying veri hard to get along wif her.. i too can see tat xin is too trying too mix around wif me.. yep, though dere might be alot of prob btw me her in the past, dere reali no prob wif me wif her!!! u can ask xin.. i hav been trying to chat more in class n in sch wif her.. sometimes smiling like a fool to her :) haha.. i believe in fact i hav understand n able to tolerate her better now.. in addition, i dun find her tat unfriendly tat i used to tink.. i will constantly shower xin wif care n let her feel the POWER OF LOVE!!! nah.. jkjk.. too mushy.. but reali xin, i tink both of us ar working n improving on our communication, so yar, fret not :)
2ndly, like i always say, when im quiet, tat does mean im mad.. when im realli mad, i will voice out.. hmmm.. maybe u ppl haven see me reali mad b4.. ( maybe a demo is gd ) oops... hehe.. yar.. i too tend to tink alot, which i agree tis prob lies in me.. tat y i either keep myself occupied wif stuffs or critical tinking ( daydream) whole day.. n becoz of tat, i always got myself unnessary stress for nothing.. for tis, i admit im in fault ya.. sry.. coz im not good in putting my emotions n feelings across to others..
lastly, like wad cj said, we high-5 hav been quite cold toward one another.. be it be studies, fun, duties or wateva, i believe we still can cum together at times.. i did question myself: ar we juz a bunch of ppl tat enjoy fun, but cant face difficulty together or crumble on the verge of facing trouble?? nah, i dun tink so.. one gd example to show tat is the time we spent during pre-promos period.. we still manage to hav great deal of fun despite the overwhelming stress we hav to endure, though we end up chatting again n again instead of studying.. yep, maybe our way of communication did breakdown and i guess we do hav to cum together to tolk abt tis face to face, juz like wat passerby tagged on our blog.. thx for ya concern.. back to topic, we do reali need a gd talk n solve all our misunderstanding or so.. i dun believe tat we would crumble after facing so many hurdles together..
guess all tolk is nothing.. maybe let action decides.. im tinking tat we meet up tis wed after sch.. probably abt 5 to 6? n hav our meal ourside to spend some quality time.. coz we to tolk to me, i want to know u better and crap.. im not sure i myself could confirm cum tat day itself but i sure try my best to keep myself free tat evening.. if we dun solve our own prob, who will? im not sure if u ppl can make it, so y not we discuss in further details tml or so.. at the same time, we can olso make up a valatine day dinner for xin ( jack's place, anyone?) yar, we do realli need to consider abt how we hav been treating n communicating wif one another over the past month or so..
to Cj : thx ya for voicing out ur feelings, if not i tink i would not tink abt tis issue tat much though i too see tis prob.. abt the sharing ting, its abt not willing to share = not friend.. u might not agree wif me, but i reali trust tat everyone should be given a space of his or her own.. a space tat sharing does not cum into the pic.. i dunno how would u wan to tink abt tis, but im reali frank tat i hav been sharing wif alot wif u ppl compared to any other friends i did before.. maybe ur criteria of great friends include abt sharing.. but for me, sharing is impt, but not to a veri LARGE extent.. i alway tink tat to understand how one tink instead is more impt.. well, tat wad i see.. n it might differ alot from urs.. but ya, i will continue to work hard to open up.. n overcum the bad expriences of confining to others.. :)
tat all i wan to say for the time being.. after a series of events tat happen to me recently, i learn tat i cant hold on to everyting.. doing tat will only lead to misery n unhappiness.. to let go is the new lesson i learnt.. yar, n i will be happier in a way or another.. ( n pretty pretty )
~zhao~
